How to Create Intimacy Without Sex

You might still remember the 90s: flicking through magazines like Bravo, Popcorn or Cosmopolitan, you could hardly turn a page without stumbling across a feature on intimacy – the best sexual practices and positions, star sign compatibility, and tips on what to do (and definitely not do) on a date. Have you ever wondered whether intimacy might actually mean far more than all of that? If so, we've got the answer for you!

What is intimacy?

According to research, intimacy is built on 7 key factors: 

• Trust
• Acceptance
• Honesty
• Compassion
• Security
• Affection
• Communication 

When all of these are present in a relationship, partners experience genuine intimacy and grow together. But did you notice that something's missing here? Exactly – sex. Because intimacy actually means far more than simply undressing in front of one another.

4 different types of intimacy

Studies show that there are 4 different types of intimacy:

Physical intimacy - loving touch that satisfies the need for closeness. It can be entirely non-sexual, such as hugs, a pat on the back or a massage.

Emotional intimacy - understanding and acceptance of the person opposite you, a soulful connection formed through shared experiences and joys.

Spiritual intimacy - shared spiritual experiences, beliefs and values.

Intellectual intimacy - learning together and discussing topics that interest you both. 

Intimacy in a relationship

Intimacy in a relationship means more than simply being sexually compatible! 

So what else can it be? You've probably guessed already: trust, security, sincerity and compassion – all of these create the feeling of being in a close relationship where you can simply be yourself. And even when you're not in the mood for sex, you can still share intimate moments with your partner.

Have you ever considered that the difficulty of keeping the flame of passion alive can be explained scientifically? That not everything is as relative as it seems? We've written an interesting article about how desire works (and what does and doesn't turn you on) – we'd recommend giving it a read! 

Ultimately, it's perfectly normal that – regardless of how much time you spend with your partner – you'll go through a phase where you're looking for a different kind of intimacy, beyond sex. Here are 5 lovely ways to find it – and you can put them into practice at any time!

More hugs

Of course, you'll say, we hug every evening before falling asleep! Hugs during a film or after sex are the most common. But how often do you hug your partner for no reason at all, in the middle of the day? Did you know that hugs have been scientifically proven to be good for your health, and that they can strengthen intimacy and emotional closeness between you and your partner? 

A comforting hug can be the perfect excuse for time that belongs only to the two of you – to talk, or simply to wind down together. In these moments your body releases oxytocin, dopamine and serotonin, creating a feeling of happiness and connection. 

Massage as a form of self-care 

And while we're on the subject of hugs: try a deep massage! It might be exactly what your partner needs to relax and let go of the week's stress. Massage isn't just a form of self-care – with a massage oil you can take it to a whole new level. Take it in turns and tell each other where you're feeling tension. Setting aside a regular day for a session like this strengthens the intimacy between you through the care you show one another. So you've nothing to lose – quite the opposite!

A sensual shower or a relaxing bath 

Sharing a shower with your partner doesn't have to end in sex! The relaxing space of the shower can be the perfect setting for intimacy and self-care. What could be nicer than a playful soaping session? And if you opt for the bath instead, you can create an even more relaxed atmosphere: ambient music, a bottle of wine and face masks! A wonderful way to connect with your partner while you both completely unwind.

A long walk 

How lovely is it to wake up on a Saturday morning and decide to go for a long walk with your partner? A wonderful activity, perfect for conversation and little discoveries in nature. You can even turn it into a date: plan the route in advance, with a stop at a café or a nice restaurant. And if you choose a hike, you get to admire the beauty of nature together. Wherever you end up going, a long walk can strengthen the intimacy in a relationship.

Do as you would be done by 

Well… things change when it comes to breaking out of your own routine too! Try an activity your partner loves, for example – and vice versa! It's the perfect opportunity to show each other why something means so much to you. It could be a favourite film, a trip one of you has been longing to take, or a place from the other's childhood. Or, if he's been trying to talk you into watching football – finally watch a match together.

Intimacy doesn't happen by chance and can't be built overnight. Developing intimacy is an investment of time, energy and affection! And since we're talking about intimacy: the products you use during your period are the most intimate hygiene products of all – which is why it's so important that they protect your health.

With ENROUSH, you can be sure that no harmful ingredients (chlorine, chemical bleaches, fragrances, dioxin, plastic) come anywhere near your vulva or your vagina. All ENROUSH products are made from 100% organic cotton.